Because of the large amount of weight my body has, my feet hurt and the bones in my feet shirt out of position, exacerbating the arthritis, causing tendinitis and leave me prone to corns, calluses and plantar fasciitis.
Because of the large amount of weight my body has it causes pains in my knees, hips, even my neck, and may have contributed to the degenerative disc disease and neuritis I have.
Because of the large amount of weight I carry I get winded climbing up the three flights of stairs to my apartment, while walking a few blocks to my car, while shopping in large department stores or malls.
BUT
From almost 60 years of dieting, my metabolism is equal to that of a slug or sea sponge. My core body temperature on awakening routinely is between 95 and 96 degrees F, my resting pulse rate is typically in the 40's, I've officially been diagnosed as hypothyroid (but still being under treated), barely sleep at night, have severe brain fog, and I gain weight if I eat even 1000 calories a day. In fact, even as a 10 year old active tomboy I gained weight at 1000 calories a day.
I KNOW dieting for weight loss doesn't work. I KNOW very low calorie food plans, the ONLY thing that will make me lose about a pound a month, is harmful to my health and will cause even slower metabolism. So why do I still harbor the Fantasy of Being Thin? Why do I still read all these weight loss books, visit diet doctor sites, read OA literature, load up on half a paycheck's worth of greens and other fresh produce (which always goes bad before half of it gets eaten), and when I have the energy, still weigh and measure everything I eat?
I guess I'm just, as my husband frequently says, fucked in the head when it comes to my weight. Even after all these decades.
