Google it, the "Fantasy of Being Thin" - you'll find hundreds of sites telling you that you don't have to be thin(ner) to get what you want out of life or even be healthy. I believed it for a number of years, getting heavily involved in Fat Acceptance, the Health at Every/Any Size Movement, all the fat and "intuitive eating" blogs and forums and mailing lists, including Overcoming Overeating. I really, really want to believe in it all.
But I've been having a heck of a hard time.
Yes, for a lot of people, and for me for many years when younger, it IS possible to be perfectly healthy with an abundance of pounds on the body, including being double or more of what the height/weight charts say you should weigh for optimal health.
Then I got older. My previously perfect lab numbers started changing for the worse, no matter how I changed my daily diet (no-added fat, plant strong, the diet President Clinton and Rosie O'Donnell *said* they were doing then slid off of). Unlike them, I don't add oil or eat fish - I follow the food plan 100% about 99% of the time and HAVE been for a number of years, long before Forks Over Knives. While other people started dropping their weight like sweat off a fat lady in August (Yeah, like ME on even a warm day in winter), I'm still fat, and even gained a few pounds over the years, and although my lab numbers got a bit better they didn't get that much better. Every nutritional expert I consulted with told me I have to lose weight before those numbers will improve any more, and not the "5 pounds make a big difference" weight loss, but at least half my body size type weight loss.
It's not like I haven't tried, but what more do they expect me to do? Eat less, move more. Yeah, yeah. I've been hearing that since infancy, when my formula was watered down because I gained 3 pounds overnight in the newborn nursery. I was on calorie restricted diets as a baby, toddler, child, pre-teen, teen, young adult, and middle-aged adult. I'm now approaching my senior years and still hear the same tired spiel.
I want it to stop. I want to be left alone.
Friday, November 09, 2012
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